Raluca Florescu

Empaths don’t fall for selfish partners, they volunteer for responsibility and get hired.

In my view, selfish people often look for partners who easily take on responsibilities. They want someone who works hard, who cares about how they are perceived in the world, and who is willing to give their time to others. A selfish and dominant person will choose someone easy to control , someone who will make life easier for them without the other doing much. For some, money and the lack of domestic duties matter most; they’ll look for partners who will take those tasks on. Others prefer a partner who will take on all domestic tasks and remain financially and emotionally dependent on them.

At the start, empathetic people feel important; they like to assume responsibility. They do it willingly, driven by a deep need to be seen and appreciated, believing that this will earn their love. But if, from the beginning, they are not appreciated, not validated, and not supported, the dynamic turns toxic. They must also make sure they share the same set of values, without shared values, even love becomes conflict. Because without validation and appreciation, the old wound of disappointment opens again inside empathetic people.

How can empathetic people avoid unhealthy relationships?
 At the start, they need to notice whether the person they’ve chosen truly values and supports them. They should stop making excuses for the lack of help and recognition, and stop living in the future, holding on to the illusion of one day being appreciated. They also need to make sure that both share the same set of values, because without this, even love can easily turn into conflict. Without validation and appreciation, the old wound of disappointment opens again inside empathetic people.

Conclusion: Empathetic people often believe that giving more will one day earn them love and appreciation. But when recognition never comes, disappointment grows, and what once felt like devotion turns into a burden. The truth is simple: real love does not need endless sacrifice to be seen. It begins with balance, reciprocity, and the courage to walk away from illusions.

Editing & translation assistance by ChatGPT.